četrtek, 14. avgust 2008

SOMEBODY STOP ME!

Everybody knows him from the 1994 Jim Carrey classic, but few people know that The Mask is based on a comic book series that was published by Dark Horse comics.
A while ago, a collection of the first 3 arcs was released under the name The Mask Omnibus (everything) Volume 1. I read all 3 of them (except for the issue with Stanley Ipkiss, that isnt available on the net) and I have to say that its bloody amazing.
Its different from the movie though. As you can see from the pic on the left, its very bloody and Big Head (The Mask) isnt a hero. He takes over the person wearing the mask and what he does is reflected on the persons personality.
Ipkiss isnt the main hero, the main hero is Lt. Kellaway (played in the movie by Peter Riegert) and Ipkiss' ex-girlfriend Kathy. Their goal is to get rid of the mask and the hitman who will stop at nothing to get it, Walter.
So yes, the movie is different from the comics, but at least it didnt rape it like this crap did:


sreda, 13. avgust 2008

My Top 10 Monty Python sketches


Monty Python were, without a doubt, the greatest comedy group ever. They created sketches that are timeless. 50 years from now, people will still laugh at them. The Monty Python crew was made out of 6 geniuses: John Cleese, the deceased Graham Chapman, Michael Palin, Erid Idle, Terry Jones and, the now famous director, Terry Gilliam. Their show was called Monty Pythons Flying Circus. Each episode was made out of a series of sketches that werent connected in any way. The sketches didnt end end with the usual punchline, which the crew hated. They knew how difficult it is to come up with a good punchline that wont ruin the whole sketch, so they ended the sketches usually at the middle and followed it with another sketch, etc...
It was a winning formula that gave us some of the best sketches in history. Here are my favourites.

10) Bicycle Repair Man
A parody on old comic book TV series, this sketch takes place in a world, where everybody is Superman, thus making Superman an ordinary citizen. But even Superman needs a hero. And that hero is Bicycle Repair Man.
A clever sketch with hilarious acting (Bicycle Reapir Man?! But how?!) and a very random ending.

9) Olympic Hide and seek
What if "hide and seek" was part of the Olympics? This sketch answers that question.
The sketch also has one of the most hilarious endings ever:
"The official result of the World Hide-and-Seek, Mr Don Roberrs from Hinckley, Leicestershire, 11 years, 2 months, 26 days, 9 hours, 3 minutes, 27 seconds. Mr Francisco Huron, Paraguay, 11 years, a months, 26 days, 9 hours, 3 minutes, 27 seconds. The result - a tie. "

8) Piranha brothers
A parody on crime documentaries, this sketch tells us about the horrors of the Piranha brothers, two mob leaders.
The people interviewed are their old english teacher, who cant speak english, a transvestite prostitute, a nervous pimp and a couple of friends who got their heads nailed to the floor by the Piranha brothers.

7) The Spanish Inquisition
One of their more famous sketches, this one opens up with a man telling his wife about a cattle. She asks him what does it mean, he gets upset and says "How should I know, I didnt expect the Spanish Inquisition!".
The rest is history.

6) How not to be seen
In this one, John Cleese as the narrator, teaches us the importance of not being seen. You have to see it, to believe it.

5) Mouse problem
Similar to the Piranha brothers, this is a crime parody that talks about the mouse problem in Britain. What makes this sketch so funny, is how John Cleese, playing an ex-mouse, tells us what happens at these mouse meettings. It is then followed by a psychiatrist, that confesses that he likes to dress up like a mouse and that he has also burned down a great public building.

4) Self Defense against fresh fruit
In this one, John Cleese, teaches self defense.....against fresh fruit. Harmless, right? Think again.

3) Upperclass twit of the year
Its like the Olympics, only retarded. A couple of upperclass twits have to complete a certain number of tasks to win. The last one: kill yourself.

2) Funniest Joke in the world
A joke writer writes a joke that is so funny, it kills anyone who reads it. Soon, the military hears of the joke and decides to translate it into german, one word at a time. One man tried to translate 2 words and got sent into a hospital. They use it against the germans with great success. The germans decide to create their own joke, which backfires horribly.
A truly hilarious sketch.

1) Mosquito Hunters
Imagine Steve Irwin....with a bazooka......hunting bugs.
If this sketch doesnt make you laugh, you are emotionally dead.

sobota, 09. avgust 2008

My Top 10 movies of all time

I usually dont like posting Top 10 lists, because sometimes I forget about a movie and have to rearrange the whole list then. But since I have nothing to post about and I doubt that I have forgotten about a movie, here.....we.....GO!

10) Forrest Gump by Robert Zemeckis
Originally, I wanted to put Star Wars V as my #10, but then I remembered Forrest Gump.
Ive seen this movie many, many times and its always a joy to watch. Tom Hanks gives one of the best performances in film history.
The story starts with the mentally challenged boy named Forrest Gump who falls in love with his only friend Jenny. They are separated when Gump has to go fight in the Vietnam war, while Jenny becomes a drug addict.
A movie that will make you cry with every viewing

9) The Shining by Stanley Kubrick
I wont lie, I never read the book, but this movie is just amazing.
It tells the story of a writer, played by Jack Nicholson, watching over a hotel with his wife and son over the winter. He goes (even more) insane and goes on a killing rampage.
Again, its best not to know what the movie is about.
Now, some people might say that the book is better, because Jack Torrence isnt insane at the beginning, but I prefer seeing an already crazy person, go even more crazy. Its less cliche, in my opinion.

8) Memento by Christopher Nolan
Christopher Nolan is currently the director with the most potential. I see him becoming the new Kubrick. His main goal: to tell a good story and tell it good.
Memento is told backwards, which means that each scene will be followed by a scene that preceeded it. Confusing? Yes. Great way to tell a story? Yes.
This movie also has a great twist ending, meaning great rewatchability.

7) Ed Wood by Tim Burton
I wont lie, Tim Burton is one of my favourite directors ever. This movie prooves his greatness. I would consider this one of the best biopics ever, along with Amadeus. It should be shown to anyone who loves movies or would like to become a film director.
The charm of this movie is how Tim Burton managed to transform Ed Wood from a loser to a winner. Ed Woods movies were never meant to be taken seriously and Tim Burton knew that. They were fun little movies that Ed Wood made out of his love for film.
After Ive seen this movie, Ive grown a lot of respect for Ed Wood. I mean, you have to respect someone who fought in the war, while wearing a panties. :)

6) Aliens by James Cameron
A sequel to the critically acclaimed sci-fi horror movie Alien, this movie is one of the rare sequels that is actually on par with the original.
This movie is more of an action movie than a horror movie, but I like it that way. Cameron knew that the only way to successfully continue a great movie is to make it as different as possible.
This movie also has the best screen heroine ever, Ellen Ripley. Its this movie, where she really becomes a great character. Sigourney Weaver was nominated for Best Actress, which is a rare even in sci-fi movies.

5) Alien by Ridley Scott
In space, noone can hear you scream.
Probably one of the best taglines of all time, this movie will really make you scream. You know what scene I am talking about. And for those of you who dont, I wont spoil the surprise.
The less you know about this movie before you see it, the better.

4) Amadeus by Milos Forman
A biopic of the most famous composer ever, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, this movie may be long, but it is worth it.
Two of the actors in this movie were nominated for Best Actor, F. Murray Abraham as Salieri and Tom Hulce as the hyperactive Mozart. They were both great, but I prefer Tom Hulce, mainly because of his laugh, which film fans will never forget.
The plot is mostly simple. Italian composer Salieri looked up to young Mozart as a child, but his father refused him a career in music. Because of this, Salieri prayed to God that he could become a successful composer. Shortly after this, he father dies at the dinner table. After his fathers death, Salieri chooses to devote his life to music. He becomes the court composer to emperor Joseph II.
One day he meets Mozart, who is basically a party animal. He cant believe who Mozart actually is and is even more angry to find out that Mozart is better than him by a mile. He vows revenge to God for giving a man with no class greater talent in music.
A movie with great acting, great music and beautiful scenery, Amadeus is a movie that shouldnt be missed.

3) The Godfather by Francis Ford Coppola
The most loved movie of all time, The Godfather is a great mob movie. The late Marlon Brando is amazing as Vito Corleone, the Godfather to the Corleone family.
The ending is mind blowing. I am talking about the infamous montage near the end, where Michael Corleone gets rid of all his enemies. And lets not forget the closing shot of the movie. Michael Corleone has become a man that he swore he would never become.
2) 2001: A Space Odyssey by Stanley Kubrick
Before I watched this movie, I didnt think that it would become one of my favourites, but I really loved it.
The movies pacing is, some people might say, odd, but thats the charm of the movie, in my opinion.
And really, how can people not see what the point of this movie is?
Its about the evolution of man and the race between technology and men.
The second point is a little bit hard to figure out. I found it out by accident and Im glad I did.
If you havent seen it, go watch it now. By the way, watch it with a good sound system.

1) A Clockwork Orange by Stanley Kubrick
This movie has it all. Great plot, great acting, great pacing, great music, but my favourite part is the narrating. Morgan Freeman, eat your heart out.
I really like the moral of this movie. If we, the society, try to change the way a person behaves, then we destroy the persons soul.
Its a great moral and its given to you on a plate, so I dont know why some people say that it has no point.

petek, 08. avgust 2008

AW HELL NAW!


You are looking at a man. A man of CGI. To look into the mind of this man, you would need nothing but a towel and a sponge. For this, ladies and gentleman, is no ordinary man. This is Michael Bay.

To the Bay, classics are just another paycheck. The Bay has no morals.


Deciding that his swimming pool is one square kilometer too small, he came up with an idea, truly worthy of a Bay.


He decided to remake classics such Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday the 13th and The Birds.


But lets be serious, nobody cares about Friday the 13th. It Nightmare and Birds we are all worried about. I consider Nightmare to be almost perfect, it took the slasher genre and gave it a twisted imagination. Everything was possible.


The Birds, what can I say? Its Hitchcock. Eventhough I didnt like it, you cant touch. If Hitchcock couldnt impress me with it, I doubt the Bay can.


In short, I really hope these remakes stop. They are ruining the image of these classics to the younger generations. Please Bay, this is not "AWESOME!".

Tropic Thunder


Oh man, Its coming. This is the second movie Ive been looking forward too (after TDK).

What can you say? Its the perfect comedy for film fans, anyone who knows whats happening in the film world nowadays.


But the biggest reason I cant wait for this movie is Robert Downey Junior. He is a fantastic actor.


And it looks like he wont disappoint here either. One critic said that he is almost as good as Heath Ledger in TDK.


That is pretty big words, considering this is a comedy. Will he get the nomination. No, I doubt it. But I know that it is a hilarious performance and I cant wait to see it.

Will the real troll stand up, please?

And then shut the fuck up, please?

My Top 5 most anticipated video games of 2008


1) Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
If you dont know what game I am talking about, I have only one question for you.
Hows the weather on Mars?
The force powers look badass, the apprentice looks badass and even the slogan of the game is badass:
"Kicking ass with the force!".
Beautiful......I think Im gonna cry now.
2) Gears of War 2
I loved the first one, but this one.....WOW!
3) Prince of Persia
The Sands of Time trilogy is probably my favourite video game series of all time. It had a great atmosphere and the gameplay was always great.
Ubisoft took a lot of changes to the new one, but I think we are in good hands.
4) Spider-man: Web of Shadows
One reason: Have you fucking seen the combat?! ITS AWESOME!
5) Aliens: Colonial Marines
This would have been at #4, if it wasnt for one tiny little thing: NO GAMEPLAY FOOTAGE!

Thats it for my Top 5 most anticipated video games of 2008. Lets hope they are all good.